"I cannot recall" as a favored cover up

Saying "I cannot recall" is a favorite way that enactors cover up unkind deeds. Nick said that when Cara said he had been cruel. This is the story of how they got back in touch with each other.

Two months after Nick sent Cara the birthday card and Cara concluded that Nick was clueless, Nick got in touch through email. He began with, "I probably should not be doing this but what the hell...been playing on Google Earth and tried to bring up your house but without success."

He said he looked for "the circle around the tree" in Cara's front yard. He said he was "beginning to feel old and mortal." He complained about work. He had done an internet search to see what Cara had been up to. He said his search "suggests you are busy. " Then he asked if Cara had any news.

Cara wrote back a week later. She told him that his email had come just at a time when she was missing him especially and she wondered about psychic connection. She continued,

"We've had such wonderful times together that I said to myself this week I find it hard to believe that these times were not wonderful for you, too. I cherish my memories of us together and would like the barriers between us to dissolve. I can't see how that is possible, although there was a time when I would have done all I could to have seen that happen.

"I'm glad you think of me, and I hope you cherish the memories."

She told him a bit of news about friends who had had a commitment ceremony the week before. She said that the words the two women exchanged were words "I wish you and I could have said to each other: Loving what we know about each other and trusting what we do not know."

She continued, "My wish for you is that you say those words to someone who is worthy of them.

"You have a full life with Moira and her family. Unless things change drastically and you finally come clean, I see little hope that I would want even an email friendship with you. There is far too much unexplained cruelty from you to me for me to ignore. You did say once, 'I hurt you,' and you were contrite. I actually need much more explanation than that."

She said that she cannot see how even an email friendship is possible when there is so much that she wants Nick to explain.

Nick responded right away. He said, "Ok. I thought we could have had an email orrespondence but I read your words 'I cannot see how we can maintain a connection even via e-mail' and I respect them. We did have wonderful times and they keep coming back to me when I least expect them, and yes I also 'cherish' those memories."

He said "I cannot recall" the cruelty or it was about. He continued,

"Sometimes you cannot explain everything in this world. I hope that will always be the case. We need some 'unknowns' even when it's our own behavior. The world is healthier with some mystery in it, even self mystery."

If Cara needed more reason to conclude a relationship between them was hopeless, she had it.

A few months later, U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales testified under oath before a Senate committee that he "cannot recall" the events that led up to the firing of 8 U.S. federal attorneys.

"I don't remember" is a variation of "I cannot recall."

There must be a school for shits that expert recipients know nothing about. Where is that school? How do people learn to be shits? Does anyone know?